It was shortly after my affair was revealed that Scott and I viewed this movie together with our church. I will never forget my reaction to the first time I watched the movie called the Passion of the Christ. As a christian I have read the gospels and heard sermons on Jesus' last time here on earth. I've read about the passover and Peter denying Jesus. I have read about the persecution and suffering Christ endured on the cross. However, nothing, I mean absolutely nothing brought the point home but this movie.
This movie is raw, real and gruesome as Jesus is being beaten. The crack of the whip still replays in my mind, and it has been over 8 years since I've seen the movie. I jumped and winced every time I heard the whip crack..at first I was able to watch, but as the whip cracked again and again and again..and the skin of Jesus ripped and tore..I had to turn my head. Tears streamed down my face as I heard the sounds.
I sat in my comfy movie theater seat and had a heart to heart with Jesus. "I am doing this for you. Your lies your infidelity are marked upon my body. I had a choice too. I could have said no. I could have turned away when my Father asked me to carry this cup, but I didn't. I knew of all the sins you were going to commit. I knew that you would need me to do this. See the tears in my flesh. See my blood pouring out. See, they are nailing me to the cross...here I am being crucified for you. Your lives, your infidelity...is payed for. Your broken marriage vows are paid for. Your life is ready to be restored. Your sins are forgiven as soon as you ask, as soon as you are willing to admit your sins. By my blood your sins will be as white as snow."
It still leaves me speechless to know the price my Jesus paid for me. My sneaking around. My temporary pleasures. My immediate desires are all there hanging on the cross with my Jesus.