Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Seek Help

Growing up my family was forced by the courts to seek counseling, both individually and as a family. It was pure torture. It was uncomfortable. It was draining. It was hard to dig deep and share feeling that we don't even know how to express. I didn't always agree with the advice that was given to me.

I think one of the main issues with the counselor we had to see was that we didn't see a "christian" counselor. I really think it is important to put your trust in someone who believes what you believe. A lot of the counselors we met with talked about statistics..and I often heard that I was going to be a statistic.

Unfortunately Scott and I didn't seek professional help. We met with a pastor from Scott's Parent's church a couple of times, but after that we didn't meet with anyone. We thought that we could handle piecing our marriage back together ourselves. A harsh reality 8 years later is that I been dealing with depression because of unresolved issues surrounding the affair. Scott and I are just now letting some things go. I am just now finally being able to forgive myself, but that's a whole other topic.

We of course had God on our side which is the reason for our success. It was only by His grace that our marriage was restored and repaired to the degree that it is. We of course still have our ups and downs like every couple, but we definitely communicate more about everything.

Before you think this is the end of the story..please stop. saying goodbye and moving on are two different things.

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